finally

my guitar got a little bit progress liao........wkakakakxz

tonight

tonight we gonna EAT on the floor.....EAT on the floor

i found this piece of thingy on FB

两个人一起久了，女的会越来越爱男的，男的越来越随便。男的会说女老是胡思乱想，女的就说男已经变了不像以前那么宠她…其实大家都没变，只是时间变了，因为彼此关系变亲密了，习惯对方，所以不会再像热恋那样，女的会胡想，无论如何请不要对爱情偷懒，否则只有平淡.然后矛盾争吵再到分手。♥

wt it says so real and it remind me of what she said to me.....hahahxz....i think this is happening among all the couple lah..

TOKUN

wao today i just slept for 3 hours,then hav'ta wake up drive all the way to Bukit mertajam,alma.

wao today bakc to BM is like so long i dint go there liao....i think 3 weeks??hahahxz

my thigh i weak...haixz..i can't hike the mount.as a pain in ass you know..i have such stamina but i don't have the

power to hike that mount....i feel want to vomit a couple times on the road up tokun....so lame you know hahahaxz.....i think i delayed all of them about half an hour or more i think i keep on stop i tak boleh tahan...it kills...at there we find a new friends desmond lian.....the yougest among us i think hahahx....love to know new people.....hahahaxz
2nd time go out with wilson,its quite wierd when doing introduction,hi my name is wilson,vincent and im jaysen....3 of us have same pronouncation at the back of our name.....hahahxz

i don't know it took us how long to reach half of the mount tokun lah....but it sure relax where i can rest....have a chit chat there....hahahxz...enjoy gak pua si when the wind is so cold and relaxing...

after getting enough rest we off to the tower hahahxz...we didn't when up that far lah....just about 500m there is a nice scenery....wao...all the mist and able to see that mengkaung lake..... wao so big so attractive....

sorry ya....my htc wildfire maybe be disappointing ya....hahahxz
but it is sure nice to stay up here and enjoy the view...i love it...the breeze..i super nice...super cold....i will come here again....next time...next stop i think i want pi mengkuang lake have a visit liao....

suddenly silent again...

just finish eating my nasi lemak wao...so damn full later need to go run half an hour and go build up d....hahahahaxz...
while eating my aunt ask about cg aikxz...don't know how to answer also....the question suddenly come out and just all the sudden my mind totally blank.....don't know what to answer....
but until now when they asked why will break it is your fault or her fault,you got other one or she got the one le??i just tell im still single so does she...somehow i still protect her image....until now....my yi yi say she like her so much so beauty,cute and gao take people heart...hahahxz...this i have admit she good in this...

my aunt say i stupid hurt loh.....but really i am..she said maybe in future still can...future thing is unpredictable...let it be lah....not sad or what...just when this question me...i everytime really don't know how to answer....

祝君好

i so love this song.......

finally after one month

http://vitaronicbirdnest.yolasite.com/

my own site finally start liao...now what to do is start advertise it.......go go go......

no more thinking.....

I will change the whole me....do the best in my life....no more lam nua liao......

in future i will court you back,as one word i won't believe in fate.....everything is control by our hand.....for now i will completely put it aside......

in future i promise i won't be a self-centred person...only think of myself,what will benefit me

but may i be selfish a bit......cg.......i don't want change anything about you,to me you are a prefect girl for me......but there are one thing i wanna change....that is your last name....

im sorry

in this 6 days after knowing something i don't want to know.....my life turn into shit....i don't really what im thinking,what im thinking.....what is the prupose of my life.......

i have not been rational enough.....i hurt two person in a row....

chee chiang told me don't on her account le....if she know maybe you two can't even be friends....and he has the point now....cg angry me like hell le....but im for the last time i open her account....i am trying to search for a reason to let her go...i found it....it hurt enough and i feel is the time i should let it go le.....and i wish her to be happy......is me who don't respect her...i know i wrong so bad...so sucks so dick.....

michelle i sorry to her...i scold her without thinking....i scold her something that hurt her so much......i really sorry to her....i don't know what to do,what i suppose to do?i hurt two person in a row.....why i will become ane....in this 6 days i can't think rational....i don't know what i am doing.....

i just really don't know le....i really hurt them...i just so sucks....i really do

kena block

last night i at vct house...i saw cg on9.....den he use his pc to on9 too...but i notice that i can't see her....i toh feel weird d......

when last night i accidentally tear off the phone strap i know bad thing gonna happen....hahaxz...and this is the bad thing i get.....hahaxzx

to say i expect that she wil block me earlier than this eh....but i didn't expect she will so slow block me nia lah...since last time she block me in friendster......@@

i last night sent her a message before i sleep......i think is the best ending for both of us lah....this maybe the best for us to keep us apart for now....let go of all the past what happen after we break off....to say i very reluctant...but this is part of the process,i accept it and this is her choice i respect her....

live for this time gonna change really.....i will cope with it.....just i really hope her do be mature a bit.....atleast her parent will less worry her....when she out to Uni lah.......all the best to her....n wish you happy always.....

what is true love means?

true love have many defination i think...for this term i think no specific term for it....

i will say i have found mine,but that one isn't mine......

nothing i can do....saying this is a a dead person wish.......hahahxz
i think to get your true love to love you once is enough d.....it maybe not forever but atleast she do really love you once..even just a short moment.....she do say jaysen i love you so much...it's worth anything....

the moment when i feel i don't love you le,but actually i love you so much....love your everything....

even we now apart i will start to learn to let it go,when times comes,you will know whether she is yours....
there are feeling holding me back but nevertheless i will let it go...

if there is a chance for letting me say it again....i will say...i love you,you will always in my heart..i love you forever...

new life

the life without you....to say i very reluctant....

this morning when i fetch my dad to GH.....i pass by the road...the 1st time in form6 we when out after mini concert....you go to judo training.....i still remember you said dislike nia early in the morning hav'ta go jogging pass by the graveyard give you goosebump....hahahxz....and i pass by the place you stayed that night....it's the 1st time....i stil remember it clearly...that night i actually want to hold your hand while acc you go toilet just i no guts...i tell you before....that's is how our relationship begin....become more and more better......

to get back you is wasn't that simple...to let you realise how much i love you is more harder....your firewall is too strong liao....hahaxzx

every memory of you have been writen all over penang....the most difficult part is in my room....which i love most is...you sleep on my bed in the night...i scratch your head for you and sing song for you to get to sleep....just like a big baby....to say actually everytime you overnight in my house....i sleep with my mom i can't get enough sleep almost every 2 hour i will come into my room and see whether you have your blanket on...you got 'jalan cahaya' bo....see your sleeping position really funny...so rude...but thats the you i love...when everyone awake i will wake so and go in my room to lay beside you...everytime my mom and sister will scold me and ask me back to sleep....why must go sleep with her....i didn't say anything to them....but i just want to lay beside you and hug you to keep you warm..give you a morning kiss eventhough your mouth still very BUSUK....

i last night dream of you.....the time we play in my room...i press you body down so you can't fight back and i start to lick your face...hahahxz...you want lick me also can't...that is one of the sweetest moment when with you...when i geli your stomach....and you wanna fight back...because you know i very afraid eh...hahahxz...all those memory in my room...i can't forget it...maybe forever....

since you already have BF le....means you didn't hold any feeling back.....i guess....

since form4,the day i said i love you...i really do..even after years....really love you a lot....
even you are the girl that hurt me the most,but still you are the girl i love the most....maybe in future you will married another different person....but still i will always remember whom the girl...i crazy about and love the most...even i know you have a unsteady heart...but still i always believe in you that i can make you FALL IN LOVE with me....

it's time for me to move on future is an unpredictable thing maybe like jia wern said....have a long rest...when both of you really mature in handling a relationhip...and you still love her...go all for it....

i will always remember the smile of you.......

the last time i will think of it,the last time i will say it...all will be just part of my memories...of you and me.....eventhough i know you don't le....but still............
bii bii i love you forever my dearest....

i can't believe

after so long i still able to shed tears for u...........

the word i love most.....

曾经有一份至真的爱情摆着我前面，我没珍惜，到没了的时候，先至后悔莫及，尘世间最痛苦莫过于此
如果天可以让我回头的话，我会跟同个女人讲三个字，我爱你
如果是都要在这份爱情加上一个期限，我希望是一万年

time pass so fast

Another month pass by....every month of 11th....it reminds me of my greatest mistake of my life...always...eventhough 4 month already pass by....the things in my mind still haven't change a bit.....
life style has changed,my daily routine has changed,everything has changed ever since that day.....i never regret of the changes  that have been made....but i regret of the only thing..always the same thing...THE SAME DAMN THING.........i wondering how long this will keep on hunting me down.....

michelle said it is a golden opportunity to court her back.....but how??really i don't have any idea....is the same that if before sept before entering Uni,thats the end of the line....end of the story...

I'm happy with all the thing happens around me,meet so many friends,know so many interesting people,that colours up my life even more......but still no matter how i move on i still miss the old times....

i always said i so regret i enter form6....but its the time i do really cherish it....if i didn't enter form6 i never get to be so close with aaron,i will never met chee chiang..benedict.tsui fhang,keat siew.etc.etc....and if wasn't for form6 i think i never have the chance to get along with her d ba.....miss the time...every place have the memories....the hardest is it is in my room....where many things happen here.....

michelle said she really do think before to be with you forever....since she said want to go register with you....that time i do think it is a childish thinking,i'm still young,but im a bit regret on this....hahahxz but what can be done.she said that time i should say yes to her.....hahahxz...but all is just a memory....i really miracle do happens...i see she said she missing someone even at taiwan,she also post it out...but i know i not gonna be me...i'm old to her d...michelle ask me to be sporting,go contact with her but how??macam mana?i have no clue at all.....

is this a karma??for every 11th i always have to dream of the same nightmare...struggle for the same thing...wake up from dreams....every month and this is the 4th month....what can be done?

you left me with a BIG ?question mark? on my head........

haixz again

what a bad day today........usm can't get it...eventhough i expected but still i know this would be happening...hahaxz down................

just now i sit beside my mom,she asked me the same question again.is she back from taiwan liao??she got get USM bo??when i said she last night back from taiwan liao...my mom ask AGAIN....you can contact with her??ok with her liao??me say less contact liao...she said why dont contact her back...i avoid it..i just go inside the toilet.....and have a pee.....hhahahxzxz.....then come out my mom see straight to my eye....i just tell her...not i don't want talk with her,she is the one avoiding me....then i back to my room.....to blogging.....

mom i know you miss her,so hope she can be with me but....she don't want to.....i already don't dare to talk with her...i want to congratz her...but i don't think that is advicable evnthough michelle said just a congratz...is ok but i don't have the guts to message her.....i think let i be le lah.....mom....sorry....

so hope

sometimes i do think that why i want to do so many things?

if the old me here,he would said,rich or not is not a problem to me...want i want is to have a normal and stable life where i no need headache for so many things...i want to have normal life without any worries....

but what i can see now is what im doing now is finding more and more trouble....im getting into business....start to do my own business my own sales....what im trying to prove??i really no idea....i do feel very very tired...this ain't the life i seek for...i really don't know to say...i have think a lot this few days...all of this im doing now what am i trying to prove trying to achieve?is it something that i really want??i want a lot of thing....but once i done it there is no return but continue to walk on......

i really tired...i do feel want to find a business partner....at 1st i thought to work with my sis husband...but end up he disappointed me...and i think his not the typical guy can work with me...i do feel want to work with aaron but end up just me who doing all the work....he now studying...not suitable for business.....i think of chin soon....but he had failed the starting point of running sales...if in future he think this can't do again,then how??me do it again??i think of ah wee.....he is the best person that can help in this business......but in term of business i hope i can work with someone that i feel i can work with....he doesnt make me feel that....and for mason i want to work with him but....he's not the guy...tict chyuan.....i consider him and see...i don't really know his potential....but i know is he know a lot of people....i will consider him....but all need to wait....haixz.....headache

why

sometimes i just wonder why my mom will say this to me.....彩银最近怎样，想念她。Few days a go when you ask me to bring gf back when going to my biao jie wedding....when i said got, you so happy thought im going to bring her back again....

i don't want to see the face again when i said im till single....that sad face.....it make me very kek xim,you know...haixz....just one word of you....turns my mood down.......

something is in my mind again

hahaxz watch this movie posted by sharing4you.....this video hits what i desire most....

if im been given a chance to turn back the time....to the same date i always wish for.......11/2/2011....i know its impossible...but in other word i till hoping for her return.....where i can redo all my mistake and treat her more better......but still lifes goes on.......hope for the best....hoping for something to that is impossible

confuse........

actually...is it worth for waiting her again??sometimes i feel like giving up.....but eventually i didn't....im still have tears for her...just now see back her cousin picture,she post up ah gong birthday celebration..where inside got me n her picture....kissing....heart feel so pain....thinking why all will end up like this......but for now there is no reason to ask why,since there won't be answer........

sometimes i do think why i will fall in love to a girl that make my heart feel so uneasy and afraid.....i love her but she can't steady down her heart.....to walk with me to the rest of the life........10 more days it will be 11/june...where is 4 month....hahahaxz time flies so fast......as if everything just happen..

there are two thinking in my mind.........im still waiting for her or im afraid being hurt again....to say i have been very flirty after break up.....this is not me.....but this is the life of being single right......but i less to hand on my hp whole day message whole day......gaming life left so long time ago liao.....

su pei said i change a lot....in term of attitude,thinking,speech i have become mature.......but am i???hahahaxz but im happy.......atleast su pei still treat me as her friend......hahahaxz.....i still have a lot to learn....step by step to become mature.....there are a lot of stair for me to walk on,i know i can.......but as the same when i keep on moving forward she stay behind,is it mean this wanting me to let it go??i afraid the more i move on,the futher she be left behind......@@

life is being uneasy......especially in term of relationship....my mom still expect me to bring her back on this november to my cousin wedding....my mom really happy when just now i said bring your GF back ya...i said ok....she said you bring cg back are,ok back le??i can see my mom smile....but i said no im still single....i can feel my mom sad..in somehow i can't describe it......make my heart feel so sorrow.....DOWN.....